Ask Danny

I'm pretty sure I'm having a breakdown. I just threw an award I got when I was 16 for being the most improved player on my hockey team across the room, which basically means you are the shittiest person on the team but you don't suck as much as you did at the beginning of the year. So now I'm sitting here, typing on a computer that is so thin I could snap it over my knee with almost no hesitation. I'm not trying to sound tough at all, because I'm really weak and I never work out. This is all for my journal entry today. I don't feel like writing anything about anything.

Small Pains What I mean by small pains are the subtle instances of pain after you do something like stub your toe, pinching your finger, or getting a paper cut. Why are the little pains like those the ones that hurt the most? I"d rather be broken up with as I'm having my arm sawed off instead of biting my lip. There have been times where the pain was so bad that I wondered what sort of sins I had committed to be punished by God this much. I don't want demean the experiences of torture victims, but I know exactly what they've been through. One time, I pinched my finger in a door hinge and couldn't believe that this level of pain existed. It made me consider buying a big bubble to live in the rest of my life, just like that kid that lived in the bubble his whole life. There's a lot of things I dislike in this world; social media, nightmares, and baseball. But the only thing that I can't control is the small pains. I'd like to know the science behi...

What's Next? What am I going to do after I graduate? I'm genuinely confused. I almost feel as though I'm in a test-car driving faster and faster towards that concrete wall with the bullseye on it. It's inevitable that once I graduate I'm going to be thrown into a greater position of independence. This is exciting but also a little unnerving, considering I've never lived completely on my own before. I have ideas of what I want to do and I apply to jobs like there's no tomorrow. But I can't shake the feeling that I'm not doing something right, or I'm not chasing the passion that I know I want to chase. It's in the back of my mind but it's what I ruminate on most. I try to distract myself by watching sports closer than I usually do, or getting in the car and driving around to get my mind off of it. This is a temporary solution as I always find my way back to the same thoughts. What in the world is going to happen to me next? It seems...

Based On A True Story - Norm Macdonald Norm Macdonald is a stand-up comedian that had a brief stint on Saturday Night Live in the 90's, where he became a beloved underdog after the head of NBC at the time decided to fire him for making too many jokes about O.J. Simpson, who was in the middle of his murder trial. Norm Macdonald has been my favorite comedian for a couple of years now. I ran across a clip or two on youtube of him on Conan O'Brien and ever since then I have been sought out every clip of him that exists on the internet. When I heard that he was coming out with a book I knew I would have to read it the minute it hit the shelves. Well, about 2 years ago his book was released and I sat down with it and didn't stop until I finished, which wasn't too difficult as it's only 200 or so pages. The first thing I got from this book was that the first joke is made without even opening the book. Norm Macdonald had the publishers of his book put "a memoir...